Poem: I loved that man

I wrote this on Thursday 17 April 1986, for a sixth-form conference that ran at Jesus College, Oxford on 7-11 July that year. The theme of the conference was ‘Relationships’. I should probably point out that I was 17 when I wrote this and yet to have a boyfriend, let alone get married!

I loved that man

A spring day, a daffodil,
A shared walk, a sloping hill.
A smile, a kiss, a solemn vow
Of everlasting love. And now?

One child. Another.
For them, a brother.
Washing, changing, feeding, cleaning,
An everlasting round of weaning.

A poky house without panache,
A bank account devoid of cash.
For him, an armchair, television.
The scrapyard of a life of vision.

No job, no hope, no inclination.
A melancholy culmination
Of all my hopes and loves and fears,
Of all the striving, pointless years.

I loved that man.

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